While in Hong Kong , for the first time I decided to try out this new restaurant I heard all about called Amber. As I entered the amazing restaurant that was hanging with crystal chandlers dangling from the ceiling , we started with our courses one being the magnificent salad that was delivered to our table served with fresh bright starerry's, big juicy blue berry's and a mouth tingling dressing. Just as we were getting our second course I looked into the servers forest green eyes to order my food and he nearly dropped his platter.After we made eye contact he looked away with in less than 5 seconds. I kept on wondering what I done wrong to cause a reaction that big. I finally realized what it was I had looked him in the eye at a dinner function. In the Chinese culture at a family function you are not supposed to look at the person in the eye only under eye level. My face slowly but surely started to become red as a tomato. Just as the waiter got silent , so did the rest of the restaurant. I felt the ice cold air fly through the air. The vibe I had gotten was as blank as the night sky with no stars. Next time I go to Hong Kong I will make sure i never look someone directly in the eye at a family function.
Jacquelyn, very good description of the rule. I like your figurative language. Add a comma after the dependent clause "Just as the waiter got silent, so...". I like the detail words like "crystal" chandeliers and "dangling". You can use more sensory words to describe the place (what kind of fruit, what color were the server's eyes, what did he do besides almost drop his platter, what is the sound of silence... maybe you were enjoyed the taste of ___ when the waiter arrived, or ....).
ReplyDeleteJacquelyn, i like how you described the restaurant with good sensory details. I like how you said that when the water went silent so did the people. It creates suspense and emotion. Good job!
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